Ups and Downs

For the most part I am a pretty positive person, I hope you have gathered that by now.  If I am not feeling positive or happy, I usually try and push through it and, well for lack of better word, fake it.  
Some days though, you just don't feel like it and have to realize that it's OK to not be OK.

I will warn you now, there is a solid chance I am about to start cursing a bit.


So this week I'm struggling.  This is frustrating because this was supposed to be a good week.  The week where everything falls into place and I finally have a schedule.  Well, that's all just hilarious now.

I have done almost nothing I am supposed to this week.

• I am lazy due to being exhausted.
• I have done one day of training out of four.
• I have a shooting pain in my right hamstring and another pain in my left quad.
• I missed my deadlift PR tonight which normally would be OK except that's one lift for my meet in a few weeks and I am nowhere near where I want to be.
• I should be taking time off but my brain won't let me cancel my WOD tomorrow.
• I tried to have a make up yoga day (since I missed last Saturday) and forgot my mat at home so that whole planned just failed.
• Work of course, has to be stressful, because why wouldn't it be?!
• I miss my friends who live in Minneapolis because I haven't seen them in ages.
• I miss my friends who don't live here for obvious reasons.

I'll stop there because now I just feel like a whiny little bitch.  And my beer is empty.  
(If you like good beer, try this shtuff.  Never gone wrong with this place.)

But. For every negative there has to be a positive right?


One ... I decided to treat myself to some new clothes.  I bought some new summer dresses.  It's finally spring in Minneapolis.  My favorite season, bare leg season!

Two ... All of the sadness I am feeling about friends who I am not seeing or don't live here, I have to remember I have some really good people in my life, and they always seem to remind me of it at just the right times.  I woke up to this Facebook message from a good friend thanking me for the support.  

Doesn't matter how many times someone thanks me, tells me I motivate them, etc..  

Every time, it just makes my heart melt.

So what do I do at this point you ask?  I'm honestly not sure.  And I'm OK with that right now.  I kind of have to be.  I am probably going to go to bed and decide what I feel like doing tomorrow.  What is going to be best for me, my body and my mind.  It's a really damn hard spot to be in, I find myself here more than I would like, but I usually make it through OK so I have no doubt tomorrow will be the same.

I do have some other fun things in the hopper for this weekend and next week, so I am looking forward to some of that.  Time to look at the bright side of things and get back on it.

Next post I promise, will bring happiness :)